This is my first blog and I'm not as active as I'd like to be. But this blog has always been more personal. I post here when my emotions are strong, when what I have to say I hope resonates with another, and when I just need to clear the air.
Which leads me to 'grounding.' I'll go ahead and say it - I hate bars and in general, public places. The energies present tend to magnify in me, making me uneasy and I want to bolt. When "X" and I were together, I only went out with him. Because I could ground into him and feel safe. Obviously I haven't been able to ground into him for years, but I transferred that responsibility to friends.
I finished the Forrest Yoga Foundation training recently and also have started testing out a radical concept for me - grounding in myself. Egad. I know and realize, for most people, that won't make sense. I mean, bars are not scary and for an extrovert (like I am), bars and other places are actually energizing. But they've always freaked me the EFF out. I've gone out a few times with friends and each time, rather than latch onto a friends emotion and ride that for the night, I latched onto my own emotion.
I've learned that the best and strongest grounding force I have is me. Even a crazier concept for me to understand. But I feel strong and can honestly say I haven't had a moment when I want to bolt - which is entirely new to me. The power to reach into the earth by activating my feet, by slowing my breath, and by finding the fire (or light) within myself is awesome. And it's from myself that I'm finding new strength to put myself out there. There's more to come but I know - I'm getting stronger everyday. And I want to make everyone around me stronger.
